People tell you when you are going through this process that it hurts when you are not chosen. The first time we were presented I was not upset when we were not chosen because the birthmother chose a family member. Well today, it happened again. We have been presented to a mom due in July. Only 3 couples applied, 1 engaged couple, 1 married couple with no children and us. The birthmother chose the couple with no children. While I am thrilled for this couple, nothing could prepare me for the hurt and devastation in my heart when I read the words "she chose someone else." I was sitting in a staff meeting shaking while watching my computer screen refresh and waiting for my phone to ring (I had told my Principal so she knew I was not being disrespectful). I was told you get a phone call if it is a match and an email if not; I saw the lawyers name pop up on the screen and I knew. I held it together for a few minutes and then had to walk out and take some time by myself. My co-workers were awesome and could tell something was wrong, but no one questioned. We did not tell many people this time that we were even being looked at mainly because if you have not gone through this you cannot even fathom the process.
Now, I know my God is faithful and I know he has the perfect plan and baby girl for our family, but today I just needed to cry and be upset. It is kind of like the stages of grief. I was very sad, angry and then numb. It did not help my partner was not at school today as he is at a conference, so when I calmed down enough where I could talk I called him and we cried together.
Are we giving up? NO WAY! Will we apply to be presented knowingly soon, probably not. I know remember why we chose the agency we did. They do not tell you when you are being presented, the don't tell you until you get that yes. I will trust God's timing for that yes!
(if this rambled or was not clear I am sorry, I am hurting bad right now)
Wow that was a lot! I told you all we would be an open book on how the adoption process works so that is what this entry is about!
Tarrah
Thursday, February 6, 2014
Friday, January 24, 2014
Are you ready for a Challange?
FRIENDS AND FAMILY! Are you ready for a challenge???
Nick and I are challenging our friends and family to see who can be the first to get 100 friends to donate $10 to our adoption fund. I know we have a lot of the same friends, but we also have a large group of friends that are not shared. Just on Facebook we have 259 friends in common , but I have 918 and he has 350 that we do not share. I think my friends will prevail and I will reach the 100 friends mark first!
We will run this throughValentine’s Day,or February 14th. The loser will be forced to meet a demand of the winner. But lets be honest, with 100% of the proceeds going to our adoption fund, aren't we all winners?
Donations may be given by using out AdoptTogether link. Want another win? By using this link your donation is Tax Deductible!
Friday, December 20, 2013
Our God is so big, so strong and so Mighty!
The past few nights Kai has gone to bed and stayed awake singing this song "My God is so big, so strong and so mighty, there's nothing my God cannot do!" I love his innocence, because this song popped in my head this morning after reading our update!
When I woke up today I had an email saying that this birthmother had chosen to place her baby with a family member. I surprisingly was not sad at all! The whole time we have been waiting I have been in constant prayer that she would make the best choice for her and her unborn baby, and if that choice was not us I would be at peace. Well God knows what he is doing (big surprise I know) and I woke up and read my message and had an overwhelming amount of Peace. I was not sad for us, I was not heartbroken, I was ok!
Thankfully, I know that my God has our Zoie already chosen and that his timing is perfect.
So friends and family I reiterate to you
" Our GOD is so BIG, so STRONG and so MIGHTY, there is NOTHING my GOD cannot do!"
I hope each of you have a very Merry Christmas and enjoy the time with your families!
Love,
Tarrah
When I woke up today I had an email saying that this birthmother had chosen to place her baby with a family member. I surprisingly was not sad at all! The whole time we have been waiting I have been in constant prayer that she would make the best choice for her and her unborn baby, and if that choice was not us I would be at peace. Well God knows what he is doing (big surprise I know) and I woke up and read my message and had an overwhelming amount of Peace. I was not sad for us, I was not heartbroken, I was ok!
Thankfully, I know that my God has our Zoie already chosen and that his timing is perfect.
So friends and family I reiterate to you
" Our GOD is so BIG, so STRONG and so MIGHTY, there is NOTHING my GOD cannot do!"
I hope each of you have a very Merry Christmas and enjoy the time with your families!
Love,
Tarrah
Friday, December 13, 2013
Our first time being presented
Well it has happened! This week we were presented to a birthmother through a private lawyer in south GA. I promised Nick I wouldn't get too excited, but it has happened. We (ok I) have wanted to make sure that you as our family and friends were in the loop during this whole process, even if it was the not so fun part! So, because of that I have been telling everyone that we might here today whether or not the birthmother chooses us.
I ask for your prayers that if this baby girl is our Zoie that it will happen, and if this is not our girl I (Tarrah) will be able to process the idea of not being chosen. This is the reality of domestic adoption. You get shown to birthmothers and some do not choose you. I know that God has our daughter chosen and I am ok with that.
I will update you all on the outcome as soon as we know something, it may be a yes, it may be a no!
Love to all!!!!
Tarrah
I ask for your prayers that if this baby girl is our Zoie that it will happen, and if this is not our girl I (Tarrah) will be able to process the idea of not being chosen. This is the reality of domestic adoption. You get shown to birthmothers and some do not choose you. I know that God has our daughter chosen and I am ok with that.
I will update you all on the outcome as soon as we know something, it may be a yes, it may be a no!
Love to all!!!!
Tarrah
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Some BIG news!
When we got home from school today we were greeted with an amazing email. Our homestudy is now approved and we are officially on the wait list! Our family profile books have been sent out and we can be shown to birth mothers. This part of the process is the true test of endurance, so to speak, and the next leg of our journey could take as little as 2 days or it could take as many as 2 years or more. We know that God has our precious Zoie chosen already and we pray daily for her and her birth family.
This amazing news does come with a new set of challenges. One of the biggest is the financial needs that come with this phase of the process. While we know this whole experience is not only about money, we also understand that there are needs that must be met in order to make our dream a reality. When it comes to the funds, we are diligently paying off credit cards and trying to save as much as we can. We fully trust that God will provide through our work in saving, grants and fundraising. Two amazing friends have stepped up to offer family photo sessions all over the Cherokee and Forsyth County areas with a portion of the proceeds benefitting our needs. We will have a big garage sale in the spring and also hold a painting party at Picasso's Corner. We still have an active Pure Charity link for anyone who feels compelled to donate. This is tax deductible:-)
A little note from each of us......
Tarrah-
Next thing up for me is to fill out as many grant applications as I can get my hands on. I have printed a few already and need to finish filling them out. If you have any grants that you know of please send me an email.
Nick-
This is really awesome, exciting, scary, uplifting, frightening, and so much more all rolled into one. It's another major hurdle that we've passed just when we think that it will never happen. We had been figuring that the process would have gotten to this point back in early September at the latest. It's another reminder to us that God's timing isn't ours and that we simply need to sit back and trust in Him. Looks like I'm going to need to dust off my diapering skills and get ready for those all-hours-of-the-night feedings again :-) But like everyone tells me, I need a little girl wrapped around my finger :-)
This amazing news does come with a new set of challenges. One of the biggest is the financial needs that come with this phase of the process. While we know this whole experience is not only about money, we also understand that there are needs that must be met in order to make our dream a reality. When it comes to the funds, we are diligently paying off credit cards and trying to save as much as we can. We fully trust that God will provide through our work in saving, grants and fundraising. Two amazing friends have stepped up to offer family photo sessions all over the Cherokee and Forsyth County areas with a portion of the proceeds benefitting our needs. We will have a big garage sale in the spring and also hold a painting party at Picasso's Corner. We still have an active Pure Charity link for anyone who feels compelled to donate. This is tax deductible:-)
A little note from each of us......
Tarrah-
Next thing up for me is to fill out as many grant applications as I can get my hands on. I have printed a few already and need to finish filling them out. If you have any grants that you know of please send me an email.
Nick-
This is really awesome, exciting, scary, uplifting, frightening, and so much more all rolled into one. It's another major hurdle that we've passed just when we think that it will never happen. We had been figuring that the process would have gotten to this point back in early September at the latest. It's another reminder to us that God's timing isn't ours and that we simply need to sit back and trust in Him. Looks like I'm going to need to dust off my diapering skills and get ready for those all-hours-of-the-night feedings again :-) But like everyone tells me, I need a little girl wrapped around my finger :-)
Saturday, September 28, 2013
Waiting.....
Wel,l I notice that it has been a while since we have updated our friends and family on our process. Sorry about the delay but things have been the usual form of crazy around here lately.
All I can say is we are still waiting......
It has been almost 11 weeks since we finished all of our requirements for our home study. Now we wait until our agency approves us before we can be shown to any birth mothers. I am frustrated that it is taking this long, but I know that this process is a wait. God's timing is perfect and I know He has our Zoie girl already chosen for us.
We are still fundraising with mini photo sessions and thank each of you that are having your family photos taken to support us. Let us know if you are interested in a session. We have 2 family friends who have graciously given of their time and talents to offer these for us. Once these are done we will not be doing any other fundraising until the spring. At that point we will probably have a painting night at Picasso's Corner in Woodstock. More information to come as that time gets closer.
Thank you all for checking in on us and I pray each of your families are well!
TZ
All I can say is we are still waiting......
It has been almost 11 weeks since we finished all of our requirements for our home study. Now we wait until our agency approves us before we can be shown to any birth mothers. I am frustrated that it is taking this long, but I know that this process is a wait. God's timing is perfect and I know He has our Zoie girl already chosen for us.
We are still fundraising with mini photo sessions and thank each of you that are having your family photos taken to support us. Let us know if you are interested in a session. We have 2 family friends who have graciously given of their time and talents to offer these for us. Once these are done we will not be doing any other fundraising until the spring. At that point we will probably have a painting night at Picasso's Corner in Woodstock. More information to come as that time gets closer.
Thank you all for checking in on us and I pray each of your families are well!
TZ
Saturday, August 24, 2013
Pure Charity Link
Good Morning Family and Friends!
I am so excited to have found this fabulous site for you to be able to donate if you choose. The Pure Charity site allows you to make a tax deductible donation that goes directly to our adoption agency. Click on the icon on the right of the blog to access our site. We are going to continue to do some more fundraisers in the coming weeks or months, but some of you had asked how you can give now to our cause. This link allows you to do just that, and it's tax deductible! Every single penny that we raise from this goes directly to our adoption accounty which is spent solely on the fees charged from our agency.
We have heard from our social worker that she is almost done writing our home study, the next step is to go before the director to be approved. Once approved, we are on the waiting list! I cannot wait to be on the waiting list! We have begun to gather items that will be needed for Zoie to arrive. We found a set of bunk beds for the boys, which they are so excited about. We also found a crib for Zoie. We won't move the boys into a room together until closer to bringing her home, but it is nice to know we have what we need.
I cannot thank you enough for your prayers and support during this time. I promise money is not the only thing needed, that will come as we are trusting in God's timing. Prayers are the most important thing we need. We will happily take any prayers and positive thoughts you want to give! We are so thankful that you are all along with us on this journey. Expanding our family is a team effort and we are so honored that you have chosen to go through this with us!
TZ
I am so excited to have found this fabulous site for you to be able to donate if you choose. The Pure Charity site allows you to make a tax deductible donation that goes directly to our adoption agency. Click on the icon on the right of the blog to access our site. We are going to continue to do some more fundraisers in the coming weeks or months, but some of you had asked how you can give now to our cause. This link allows you to do just that, and it's tax deductible! Every single penny that we raise from this goes directly to our adoption accounty which is spent solely on the fees charged from our agency.
We have heard from our social worker that she is almost done writing our home study, the next step is to go before the director to be approved. Once approved, we are on the waiting list! I cannot wait to be on the waiting list! We have begun to gather items that will be needed for Zoie to arrive. We found a set of bunk beds for the boys, which they are so excited about. We also found a crib for Zoie. We won't move the boys into a room together until closer to bringing her home, but it is nice to know we have what we need.
I cannot thank you enough for your prayers and support during this time. I promise money is not the only thing needed, that will come as we are trusting in God's timing. Prayers are the most important thing we need. We will happily take any prayers and positive thoughts you want to give! We are so thankful that you are all along with us on this journey. Expanding our family is a team effort and we are so honored that you have chosen to go through this with us!
TZ
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